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Breaking the Ice

Small talk may sound insignificant, but it can deliver big results by opening doors to deeper connections and unexpected opportunities. For those without the gift of gab, however, conjuring up questions and sustaining light conversations can feel overwhelming—and let’s not even mention those awkward pauses.

To help ease the angst for introverts—and even some extroverts—here are some go-to starter questions and topics to make chitchat feel a little less frigid. With practice, you may even find yourself enjoying these casual interactions and the relationships that follow.

Stock images of books on shelf and two people talking

1. Book Banter

Starting a conversation with “Do you like to read?” often leads to the follow-up question, “What have you read lately?” Entertainment is a great topic for small talk, especially if you walk away with good book, music, podcast, movie, or theater recommendations. And if the person you’re talking with isn’t a reader, you could mention that there’s a word for that: bibliophobe, the opposite of bibliophile—a voracious reader.

2. Two-Word Wonder

Here’s a quick and brilliant way to reconnect with friends or coworkers you haven’t recently chatted with: “What’s new?” This simple, open invitation can shed light on what’s top of mind for your conversation partner. The next step is to listen carefully, and follow-up inquiries will flow naturally. Be prepared with a good response when you’re inevitably asked the same question. (And since you’re asking, I saw six moose last week!)

Stock images of a person hiking across a rope bridge, an Asian salad, a hand scrolling on a phone.

3. Talking Travel

Getting from point A to point B can sometimes be an undertaking, and atypical travels often turn into engaging stories. “How was your trip here?” is a great conversation starter, especially at a conference or an off-site meeting. Most people have an interesting anecdote about the planes, trains, and automobiles—or e-bikes, Ubers, and light rails—they took along the way. Recent or upcoming vacations are also surefire gateways to fun exchanges.

4. Foodie Fodder

It’s likely that you are a fan of good food, and gabbing about grub can provide some excellent topics to chew on. Even the pickiest eaters will be more than willing to share why they avoid avocados, oppose tomatoes, or shun sugars. If you’re searching for food-related ice breakers, you can ask for restaurant or recipe recommendations. Another enjoyable inquiry is “What’s the best—or worst—thing you’ve eaten recently?”

5. Networking with News

Preparing for an event that’s sure to be filled with chitchat? Review the news. Whether it’s a sports tournament, a science advancement, a piece of celebrity gossip, or a shocking feat, current events connect people. As you’ve probably learned, navigate politics, religion, and other sensitive topics carefully—but that doesn’t mean you should avoid them altogether. After all, learning about others’ perspectives can be one of small talk’s best benefits.

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